Baby Kicks??
May 28, 2012 at 11:08 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: Healthy lifestyle, Pregnancy, healthy
I think I may finally be feeling the baby! Last night I lay in bed thinking about how I couldn’t wait to feel her move, and right then I swear I felt about 4 little kicks right behind my belly button! (Which is about where she usually is, I can usually find her heartbeat just left or right of my belly button). Those were the hardest ones, then I felt a little fluttering, I am pretty sure it is the baby but have to keep convincing myself I am not just noticing my own heartbeat etc. I am so so so excited to get a bit more of this! I have been waiting not so patiently to feel the baby. My Dr. did say I have a bit of an anterior placenta (my placenta is between the baby and my belly) so that makes it a little more difficult to feel.
Also this past week I finally got back to exercising (thank god!), between being told to do nothing until 12 weeks by my RE, and then the loss of Baby B at 10.5 weeks I have been terrified that exercise would lose me my baby. I have done nothing more than walk the dog and go to my weekly ballet class (where I then avoided any jumping/spinning).
This past week I actually did a (very little) bit of jogging and bought the Susan Summers workout video which I did a few times (I admit the first night I insisted on taking out the doppler after). It is actually not a bad workout, just squats, lunges, arms, back, etc with a resistance band. I feel so much better. I do not want to be a muscleless blob when this baby comes and have to fight back into shape. I hope I can keep it up and hopefully “bounce back” once this little one shows up!
Other than that 18 weeks hasn’t brought too much. I will update tomorrow though after our big (and possible last!!! Ack!) ultrasound!
Maternity Shots
May 25, 2012 at 11:04 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 1 CommentTags: belly, Pregnancy
I have begun to think about maternity shots……I am loving this belly and I want to remember this time, because we all know I remember all the time leading up to it.
I want a range. I want some beautiful outdoorsy shots with Jon that I can send to all my family (especially since it will be fall!) and post on my walls, and then I want some semi nudey ones which show off the bump to keep hidden away for us.
Last winter, right before our third FET, I was needing a pick me up something fierce. We had just gone through almost a full year with fertility treatments and zero success, not so much as a chemical pregnancy, never a second line in sight. I felt like shit, I felt like I looked like I felt and was totally depressed about our never ending fight. In typical me fashion I was trying to embrace our current situation, so I contacted a photographer to do boudoir photos for Jon for Christmas. I figured, you know what, soon enough I am going to be pregnant and damn as much as I hate this body right now – it may never look like this again! What if I have twins?? So I did the shoot. And ladies, if you ever have the chance….DO IT.
It was absolutely fantastic, my photographer was amazing and she includes hair and makeup (and champagne!) in all her shoots, so I felt like a million bucks, and once I saw the pictures, I had to keep bumping my order. It was a gift for Jon, but in so many ways it was a gift for me. I needed to feel great again, to feel sexy and gorgeous and wanted. I wish I could afford to do it every year. I am so so so glad I did.
I imagine towards the end of this pregnancy I will feel used up and tired, fat and ugly, and I think some pics that put the bump in a beautiful light and glam it up will be just what I need.
So I have contacted her to do my maternity pics. Boudoir is her specialty but she used to do maternity, family etc, so I asked if she would do a mix of boudoirey belly photos and some outdoor ones of me and Jon and she said yes! We are still setting it up but will tentatively shoot mid September! I am so excited.
What are your thoughts on maternity pics?? WIll you do them? What kind?
And if you want to see some of this girl’s work google Jennifer Will.iams bou.doir (without the periods – I just don’t want people googling her and ending up here! Check out her most recent maternity under her categories….so cute.
A few from paradise
May 24, 2012 at 8:36 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 4 CommentsI wish I took better pictures because these do not even begin to do this lovely place justice. The tenthouses are almost all window and have breathtaking views of the ocean, mountains, trees, etc. They are each in their own area so wonderfully private. Even the shower looks out over the ocean! It is so romantic and calming. I think if I were to live in one I could not possibly be stressed.
And this is my favourite maternity dress (at 16 weeks on mother’s day!) You cannot really tell in the picture but it’s got rushing on the side and is super flattering. It is by Ripe Maternity and I bought it here in town….I might have to go back for another colour, it is perfect for lounging but looks great and really emphasizes the bump!
PS – anybody know how to make these pictures big and not as gallery pics? I do all the others from my phone – this drives me crazy!!!
One Spoiled Mama and 17 Week Bumpdate
May 23, 2012 at 8:54 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 9 CommentsTags: belly, Pregnancy
Jon left for my hometown early this morning for work. He still goes down there about 2 days a month as their tax specialist up and left (that would be me, and he can’t very well complain 
).
I came down the stairs later this morning and found this on my stairs……
JJ is Jon’s name for the baby – he keeps saying it’s a boy and he wants to name him James Jefferson (which as you can imagine I have vetoed!). My husband has a problem….this problem is spoiling me beyond belief….and his excuse is always “soon we will have a baby and it will be all about them” (This has been going on for 2.5 years now as obviously the baby did not come as soon as expected). I always get on him for it and he goes insanely overboard – and I do not think that it is a coincidence that he waited until he was out of town to give me this gift! Notice “JJ” tells me not to be mad! So this is my lovely lovely ridiculously overboard mother’s day gift that he has had hidden away for about a month (he didn’t want to bring it on holidays). I am sure when I get over the shock I will be in love with it. I did remind him that I plan to put dirty diapers in it!!! (I plan to cloth diaper).
Now for the Bumpdate!
How far along: 17 Weeks 3 days
Weight Gain: 11.5 pounds – yes, I am now using decimals as this is clearly not slowing down! I’ve gained around a pound a week since 5 weeks! Seems crazy. Although luckily seems to be mostly in the belly so far, I am scared of the day it hits my face!
Baby: Is almost 14 cm this week from crown to rump – the size of a sweet potato! And my WTE app says that the top of my uterus should be felt around 1.5 inches below my belly button, but again, I can feel it OVER my belly button!
Symptoms: Still a lot of headaches, also since yesterday have had a sore throat….not sure if baby related or a cold/strep. Yuck. Also, I keep forgetting to mention this, but for a few weeks my nipples have been really sensitive, it’s the skin, it feels almost raw, they hurt to touch.
Sleep: Sleeping great except for the peeing still, but that has been since long before I was pregnant! I recognize that I am nearing the point where I shouldn’t be sleeping on my back, but often wake up on my back. It is funny, for as big as I am, I have not been uncomfortable at all.
Movement: Definitely not, I pay super close attention and NOTHING, absolutely no bubbles, no butterflies, no gassy feelings. i cannot wait to be able to feel the baby.
Best Moment of the Week: Clothes shopping with my big bump and hearing that baby appears perfect yesterday, that the NT results were great and all looks good.
What I’m Looking Forward To: Ultrasound next week – our big one! But we still won’t be finding out the sex .
Gender: Still a girl. I have no doubt.
Bumpdate: A few pics I took this morning especially for you ladies…..finally got the bump out full and frontal – sorry if it’s a little much! And those aren’t stretch marks on my side (yet!), it’s just skin, I think it’s just the angle I was on – I hope! And then this morning with clothes. Sorry you don’t get to see my new stuff – it is all really summery and it is freezing and raining today!
Back to reality and OB Appt
May 22, 2012 at 10:54 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 8 CommentsTags: Pregnancy
I am back! And just as I figured, so much went down while away. Oh Belle I am so sorry about the loss of your beloved Pip. This shit is not fair. I cannot imagine starting again after that….how do you have faith in the system again, as if we are not weary of a pregnancy enough. I am sorry.
Holidays were fantastic. (Bleeding freak out aside). We relaxed at the amazing Rockwater Resort, where the views were fantastic and romantic, and the weather was perfect. Then We went to Seattle and did WAY too much shopping. I hit up Pea and the Pod Collections and wow…..I bought 14 items of clothing….so now I am broke….as usual . But I figure that there is nothing in Canada, this is my first of three pregnancies, and damn I am going to get good use out of these clothes since I am 4 months going on 8…..right??? Right???? All very good reasons to break the bank . Or at least that is what I tell myself. I bought a few great dresses for work, a great pair of designer AG jeggings (I need one good pair of jeans – but damn these cost more than my non maternity jeans!), a few great tops and some purple skinny jeans (I have been coveting the colored denim this year and thought I wouldn’t get to play).
There was a lady shopping at the same time as me who did not look pregnant. I told Jon – watch this, and asked how far along she was…..1 week ahead of me, with #2! And here was me looking 7 months. Too funny. The ladies working could not believe I was not even 4 months! Which, by the way, 4 months TODAY! 5 months to go! Crazy…..I am going to be the size of a house!
Had my OB appointment this morning, all is well and he said he’d like to see me in 3 weeks instead of 4, just to keep an eye on me (thank you!) even though all looks great. He said pregnancy should progress normally and baby B should not give me any trouble but is probably a good part of why I am still so big for 17 weeks! He also did a little ultrasound to locate baby as he couldn’t find the heartbeat at first, but there she was, and heartbeat of 159, flying around all busy. I have found her heartbeat at home from 120-150 usually depending on how busy she is. Also we got the results from our NT scan (ultrasound only – they wouldn’t do the bloodwork as they said all would be skewed with the two babies). NT scan was great and showed our risk at 1/4,405 so he said no risk at all. Yay! (Not that I was really worried). Our big ultrasound is next Wednesday! But we will not be finding out the gender . Oh and I signed us up for the Doula weekend prenatal course in mid July. I am really interested to take both the doula one and the hospital one.
Other than that not much, I will try to do a bumpdate tomorrow, gotta get a picture of this thing. I am still amazed that it is not causing me any discomfort because it is BIG! Measuring 36″ (from 25″) on Sunday. And that is first thing in the morning, at night I don’t want to know!
All is well
May 14, 2012 at 1:24 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 9 CommentsTags: Pregnancy, Vanishing Twin
Baby measuring 4 days ahead at 16w5d! Jon says has my skinny legs and no butt haha. But moving around like crazy and heart rate of 150. Baby B is still very visible but no bigger (in my crazy mind this morning I was imagining he was still growing but dead and that I would need to birth a stillborn baby – horrible thoughts).
Now we are driving to the ferry to head for Seattle and feeling so much better.
They could see no reason for the bleed and all looked great…we are beginning to believe more and more that this was a sex injury and completely un-baby related. How embarassing! No bleeding of any type todayand after the original mess only the minorist of spotting yesterday. When I really think back we have had these issues before, we were just never pregnant and paranoid.
Back to holidays! Take care ladies, thinking of you all, especially those of you still or newly in limbo land…..no worse place to be. Healthy babies and soon for all of you.
Trouble in Paradise
May 13, 2012 at 1:34 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 7 CommentsTags: holidays, Pregnancy
Well my self imposed no technology by leaving behind my phone was interrupted by Jon bringing both the laptop and iPad….although I must admit until now I haven’t touched either and still plan to stay away for the most part but I have a few updates.
First,we were hit by a drunk driver while getting off the ferry, luckily no damage to us or the vehicle (thanks to Jon’s clients 24 year old bronco made of steel), but the lady who hit us in smashed up her little compact car pretty good. She then tore past us, almost hit a few others as well as the rail, then smashed into a stop sign and went off the road at the first y in the road. Lovely. Was pretty eventful for our first day.
Then we arrived here…..heaven.
It is twice as amazing as I remember. I love it. We have an amazing view of the ocean and trees and mountains and are in our very own private luxury treehouse. I could live here. Who needs a house with bedrooms and a kitchen? I love everything about it here. Every side is open and has views, even the shower has a whole open wall to outside.
This morning was the real hitch Jon and I were having a little fun in bed this morning (I know you all know what I’m saying). Anyways, when finished I looked down and saw that he was covered in blood. Red blood. We both freaked out. We have not had a single bleeding episode this whole pregnancy and for that I am thankful. Anyways, I was now cursing myself for having talked myself out of bringing the Doppler – and for not having used it since the day I got it! Part of me thought it was my body clearing out baby B (who was supposed to reabsorb not come out) and the other part was terrified about baby A. We went straight to the hospital. I started crying when the nurse asked me for my address on check in and Jon had to speak to her. Luckily we got in quite quickly and she put the Doppler on right away showing a heart rate of 150. That helped a lot. Then the dr showed up and he did an ultrasound (on this really neat little handheld ultrasound machine – Jon immediately told me I couldn’t have one). I didn’t get to see it but Jon did and baby appears to be fine, and the dr said (and Jon saw) that baby B is still very obviously there, sac and all which I guess explains why I am still so damn big. He did a pelvic exam and an internal and said that my cervix is closed and that it was likely just cervical tearing, nothing to worry about. But that they will arrange for a real ultrasound for me tomorrow. I am feeling much better, and the bleeding is minimal and pink now. We are just taking it easy and are reading on our gorgeous deck with the hummingbirds.
I’ll keep you posted, please keep your fingers crossed for us that this is the end of scares like that and that our baby A will keep on fighting.
Back to the Positive and Randoms
May 10, 2012 at 8:17 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 7 CommentsTags: Gratitude, life as we know it
Ok, pity party from yesterday is now declared over. I was sad and upset and pissy all day yesterday for no reason, can I blame hormones??? And truthfully, I have been all week 
. Poor Jon has been baring the brunt of it. I haven’t been losing it or anything but there is not much he can say without me giving a snappy retort or being upset with him. I kid you not I snapped at him this morning because we stayed in bed lazing around and he still got to be on time for work……wow.
So, now I have to be done. To be upset is draining. Please ladies, help me move on!!!
Going to try a gratitude list in an effort to cheer myself up…..it usually works and I end up grinning all day, because really, life is damn good.
- I am so so so grateful for our perfect little baby growing away, she is everything we have ever wanted and she will be here in less than 6 months!
- I am so grateful for my big belly growing away, I swear I started showing at 8 weeks and I never had to wait to look pregnant, I have gotten stopped by strangers everywhere since 11 weeks commenting on my baby belly (yay it looks like a baby!) and it makes it all so real and exciting.
- I am so grateful for my perfect husband who is literally perfect……I am so lucky and spoiled in every way I can not even explain. Last night I came home to supper, lawn mowed, house vacuumed and mopped. And this is seriously every day life with him….in fact, I am going to become one of those useless women who doesn’t do anything for herself.
- I am so grateful that this mother’s day will be my last childless mother’s day!!!!
- I am so grateful for my holiday starting tomorrow, it will be gorgeous and relaxing, and exactly what this crazy bitch needs right now.
- I am so grateful for my amazing job, for Jon’s amazing job, for all the opportunities we have been given and that our jobs allow us to live comfortably and spend lots of time together.
Seriously, life is good. Life is full, we are so very lucky.
Aaah. That feels better.
Now for randoms .
Seraphine Maternity Review
Got my seraphine maternity clothes yesterday. I ordered 3 dresses, the second skin leggings, and a bikini. 2 dresses, leggings and bikini great. Other dress…..meh, way too big. overall I would say the clothes fit true to size and the quality is pretty good. The smallest size is a 4…..it is a true 4. I generally wear a 0-2 so while the wrap dress works great and gives me room, the plain fitted dress is huge (it will go back – also free returns in the US!). The maxi dress still worked, I guess because it is supposed to look big? I don’t know, but super cute . Bikini is great, I ordered a small. bottoms are perfect – they have a band that rolls up and down for maximum love handle coverage/bump show. The top is definitely built for preggo boobs. I expected it to be small but not at all, and I am sitting at a DD right now so maybe not idea for smaller cup unless you are a bigger band size. Probably C+ I would say in the small (and annoyingly, no mix and match sizing in the bikini). Leggings – FANTASTIC. They are o/s which I am always skeptical of, but they are great, super comfy and will grow with me . I got 20% from a code on their FB website and I ordered on the weekend, was shipped on Tuesday from the UK and I received Wednesday! Pretty impressive for $7.95 shipping!
Holiday and Cell Phone
Should I bring my cell on holidays??? I was thinking about this this morning…..On the one hand I think NO. I cannot stay away from it and I do not want to be checking FB/Blogs/Email/Texts while away…..I literally have it glued to me at all times, and I don’t know if I am capable of turning it off and leaving it off. On the other hand…..it is a handy camera to take pics of the scenery and little things that come up as well as my bump…..I love my phone camera, I use it daily. And I don’t want to miss all of your betas, ultrasounds, HPTs and various updates……I will miss so much, I may never catch back up. Thoughts???
Books
I need a good book or two for holidays…..I am thinking mindless trash and easy to read (I tend to go for the very serious)…..I think shades of grey is a must, any other suggestions??
Maternity Clothes
I am hitting up Seattle for maternity clothes – there is nothing good in Canada and it is all crazy expensive even though it is crap. Any suggestions? What about gap maternity? is it good, should I go there? We don’t even have Gap maternity!!!!
BFPs
Holy hell ladies the BFPs……I am so so so happy for our community, it has been almost nothing but BFPs – CONGRATULATIONS. It really gives me hope. Seriously, almost everybody who got BFNs in my cycle now has a BFP…..I have to say I would have felt so left behind if I came to this community a year ago since it took us 4 tries. But at the same time it gives me so much hope, obviously our options are only getting better. It makes me confident that those still waiting will get there soon enough – for sure!! Also gives me more hope for our frosties. And those of you with the miracle pregnancies…..WOW.
Anyways, this is a long rambling post but it has made me feel so much better.
Mad
May 9, 2012 at 1:38 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 5 CommentsRemember my crazy friend (ok acquaintance) from this post? Well she is two weeks ahead of me pregnant with twins. I am super jealous, plus she always upsets me and stresses me out since she is very harsh and overwhelming. Strong personality for sure.
Anyways, she has been upsetting me ever since I found out I was pregnant. She says things like “Oh, and are you ok with delivering at that hospital?” and told me when I ditched my horrible OB (who is her OB) that I would never find a better OB. And then she tells me things like don’t worry about it, it’s not good for the baby – thanks tips. You think I would worry if I had a fricken choice?
But the thing that upsets me the most is that she compares my loss to hers. You see in her last pregnancy she was pregnant with quints - yup super irresponsible RE who did an IUI when they couldn’t even count the follicles and her E2 was 3,000+. They wanted her to reduce to 2. She didn’t because her body naturally reduced to 2 at 9 weeks. (She later lost her twins at 23 weeks – which is devastating and horrible but that is not where I am going here). She had told me that she was so relieved when she lost the 3 because she did not want to reduce but knew she couldn’t carry 5. She knew it was best for her and babies. She compares this to my losing my twin b – who I lost at 10.5 weeks and had every single intention of bringing home with me. When I discuss the devastation versus the elation and how hard it is she compares it to her losing those 3 – the 3 she told me that she was happy to have lost. She even put herself in the same situation again – an IUI with 6 mature follicles because she was confident that even if she got pregnant with high order multiples she would spontaneously reduce and get her twins.
My loss was not a blessing in disguise, my loss was a baby that I was waiting to take home. Had I not lost him/her I would never have reduced and I sure as hell was not hoping to lose a baby, and I would definitely not hope to have the same thing happen again. Obviously I do not reply because what do I say? Umm it is not the same? My loss is worse than yours? I don’t know. So instead it just makes me mad.
And it pisses me off that she tells me to calm down and is constantly talking like I am irrational (when I literally just say things like I am worried, not like I am having a damn meltdown – god this is by text!) - she is irrational – why is she not terrified? What the hell is wrong with that girl? Why is it that she believes this time she will take home both babies and acts like I am crazy for being nervous?
Also……I know she will want to hang out once we both have babies, and I don’t think I can do it…..one I can’t listen to her knowing everything (by the way she is a nurse practitioner (in cardio not babies) and feels the need to drop it into everything as if she is a fricken pediatrician/OB/RE), but also I don’t know that I can be around her with her twins when I am supposed to have two too .
Tell me now, am I being a bitch or are these situations not even comparable at all? Or is it just still too new for me and I am taking this way too much to heart?
Bumpdate 15 Weeks
May 9, 2012 at 9:15 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 8 CommentsTags: belly, Pregnancy
How far along: 15 Weeks 3 days
Weight Gain: 9 pounds – meaning I gained less than half a pound this past week – thank God we appear to be slowing down!!! I kid you not I have eaten only healthy this entire pregnancy with zero give ins to cravings etc and eating no more than 300 additional calories and this baby/belly is determined to grow! I will be very interested to see my next ultrasound (18-20 weeks) and see what the heck is going on in there!
Baby: Is 10-12 cm this week from crown to rump – huge! The size of an avocado! And my WTE app says that the top of my uterus should be felt around 3 inches below my belly button, but I can feel it right at my belly button, so I am (obviously) still measuring ahead.
Symptoms: Still a lot of headaches which sucks but that’s about it so cannot complain!
Sleep: Sleeping great except for the peeing, but 3 nights ago I slept the entire night!!!! I bet you it has been years since I slept through the night without peeing!
Movement: Nope – I hope soon!
Best Moment of the Week: I concluded that baby is still alive (I think) with my doppler. I still don’t like the doppler as I second guess myself whether it is actually the baby I am hearing…but I think it is, and there was definitely stuff going on in there. Also have continued with the crazy shopping sprees and bought a bunch of maternity clothes online from Seraphine (check it out, cute stuff, good prices and record fast shipping). Also check their FB page as they have coupon codes – I got 20% off!!!
What I’m Looking Forward To: Holidays, Jon and I are going to lay low and also go through the baby name book for ideas . And I am really hoping baby starts moving soon, I cannot wait for that reassurance!
Gender: Definitely a girl.Also my accupuncturist the other day confirmed that’s what she thinks too (I think she forgot I didn’t want to know since she is never wrong!) when I told her I totally think girl. I actually was really upset that she told me this because now I feel like I know and I really want to be surprised . But I didn’t tell Jon that she said that, because I want him to be surprised even if I am not. Now I hope she is wrong just so I can be surprised. haha.
Bumpdate: After work on monday and then last night (last night is a maternity dress so I look extra huge and had to take a pic because I love it). One day I will have to take a bare belly pic because although I am very obviously pregnant, I don’t think I look near as huge as in clothes!
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